I need help from some fellow railfan!!

[trainfan475]

HI i know this is off topic but i need help from railfan and i need a anwser fast ok there is there girl at my school who cute nice,funny,and kind i like her and i thing she like me too but there one thing no at my school knows i am a railfan and i know she really kind but if she know i am a railfan would that ruin my chances or not so what should i do tell her i am a railfan or not

[Bananarama]

Just be certain to remove your choo-choo hat before meeting her and you should be fine.

[conductorchris]

As a general rule of thumb, women like men who are passionate about things and have interests. I think railfanning falls into that category. (This also becomes even more true as you get older and women themselves become wiser about what makes a person quality.)

I think it should come up in a normal conversation about things you are interested in, rather than thinking of it like an identity. You may have to do some explaining or "translating" into something she can understand from her perspective. If she is interested in you, she'll want to know why trains are interesting to you and so on. Because she is curious about you, probably. Hopefully.

As far as "chances," just remember she is also thinking about *you* and wondering what her chances are with you. Or anyway she will soon, after you catch her attention.

Christopher

[trainfan475]

Thanks Chris

[trainfan475]

but now how would i fit that in to a conversation

[conductorchris]

Well I would say that your first conversations are about getting to know each other. Pay more attention to her: being interested in who she is, finding out what she likes, what her strengths are. People appreciate your interest in them. You can also observe her, learn what she likes and consider how your approach with her honors and responds to who she is. Many people will naturally respond to your interest and ask you questions and it will become natural. She'll ask you at some point what you are interested in or what you do with your time and you can tell her, and what makes it cool and engaging for you. You don't have to plan to much, just make it part of the conversation as it happens.

Here's another suggestion . . . practice having conversations with girls you don't know, or don't know well. Just chatting. Getting to know each other. By having conversations when the emotional stakes are lower, it will help you relax when you do care, especially. Practice working in the the railfan piece, as a natural part of a conversation as they ask about you. Observe how people respond. Don't put too much stock in any one person's response, but have enough conversations that you can see how people respond and what they find interesting.

Christopher